The Void: Where The Change Process Stops Us
To significantly change in our lives, there
must be changes in our subconscious minds and our belief systems.
As these changes occur, we find ourselves in a transition zone, a
place of the unknown, the lull, the fog, the void, the dead space.
It is like being between first and second base on
unsafe and vulnerable ground. It is uncomfortable, new and often scary.
Often we get fearful and go back to the old safe place on first base.
And that's O.K., but at some point, we may want to leave the rut that
was not working for us.
Change requires a letting go and trust that there
is a second and third base and that I can make it there. It is about
trusting myself and God and the universal laws to unfold a new reality
for me. It is knowing that my vision, prayers, visualizations, affirmations
and wishes will come true.
Too often the test is right to the eleventh hour,
where I must totally give up and let in the new. To make it worse,
everything seems to go wrong at the same time. This is a place where
my life turns upside down. It’s a place that calls for surrender
and faith, knowing that my beliefs are being changed at a deep level.
When I was in the consulting business, my heart wanted
to move into the personal development and education field. As I was
planning this process, my client offered me a phenomenal opportunity,
with substantial equity in a company in the personal development field.
It was like falling in love--the infatuation, the fantasy, the excitement.
My mind was full of ideas.
After a few days, I sat down with myself and analyzed
it more closely. Something was saying it wasn't the right move. But
I kept the door open on the opportunity and was getting pressure for
a commitment.
During this time, my mind was in a fog. It seemed
like I couldn't think or even add 2 + 2. I was torn between what looked
like the offer of a lifetime and what my heart wanted to do--my own
programs, not someone else's. And I did not want to let my friends
down.
This fog brought on tears (yes, men can cry). It was
scary to be unable to break out of my stuck thinking patterns. My
mind seemed dead to new ideas and everything in my life was going
wrong or stopped flowing. Finally, I had to make my stand. I did not
join their group.
Making the decision relieved some of the fog, but
it was a few weeks before the dust settled and I was fully functional
mentally. During that time, I was gentle with myself, not creating
too many pressures or new decisions. I soon realized a new level of
commitment to creating and delivering my own programs and taking control
of my life.
Now, when I sense I am in this fog or transition zone,
I work to just be there and identify with it. I step back and watch
myself, careful to avoid overreacting to situations. I keep my focus
on the results I want, and I act as though they are already in place.
I stay open to opportunity.
I'm glad I've learned how it feels to be in transition,
because as I grow and change, there will be more of them, and I want
to become a master at navigating through the fog into my next vital
stage in life.
Patrice Steen and John Robson
Personal
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